Your Stress: A Barrier in your Child’s Growth!

STRESS               

If we go by the definition, stress is a feeling of emotional or physical tension. It can be caused by any thought or event that makes you feel frustrated, angry, or nervous. Stress is your body’s reaction to a challenge or demand. 

Parents are adults hence it is normal for them to encounter certain events or situations that causes them stress. No parents want their child to break a sweat over things that is not theirs to worry about. But what they do not realize is the fact that their actions or behavior might be too loud to “not see”. 

On the other hand Children are naturally intuitive and curious, they tend to recognize when something is amiss ( I remember, as a kid I used to sense it when my parents were not talking to each other or if they had a fight). Hence they use their underdeveloped brains to analyse situations. I’m sure each one of us at least once, overheard the snippets of conversations that our parents were having about some serious topic. What do you think will be the effect of it? Hence there should not be any doubt in the fact that parental stress negatively affect a child’s development.

TYPES:    

If we talk about stressed parents specifically, we can classify their stress on the following basis:-                                        

• Financial Basis
• Emotional Basis
• Social Level         
• Stress at Workplace
• Parenting Stress                                                                                                      

It can explode out in the form of Anger, Depression, Frustration, Irritation and Dissatisfaction.

Any kind of stress or its unfolding in anyway creates a very unhealthy environment. And there is no second thought in stress not sticking till the place where it came from but entering one’s personal space. It not only affects one as a victim but their spouse and their children too. That said, it’s important to be aware of triggers of parental stress to address these and better cope, before it trickles down to the kids.  

 

When parents are stressed they are more likely to be distant, less engaged or inconsistent in meeting their child’s physical, social and emotional needs. Which will lead the child being unsure about his/her needs getting fulfilled or not. I am not talking about a full blown on abusive household,no doubt It has devastating effect on child’s personality overall. The kind of households that I’m talking about here is the one where parents provide for their children and they feel a sense of responsibility towards them!

A study published in December 2013 in the journal Pediatrics found that children exposed to domestic violence and depressed or anxious parents are less likely than children without those stresses to reach developmental milestones in language, movement, and social skills

 Parents’ stress affects the child at every stage from prenatal stage to they themselves parenting. At prenatal stage the baby is more prone to psychological and physical diseases such as autism, asthma, depression, etc. Babies whose mothers were depressed during pregnancy show heightened levels of stress hormones, when observed 3 months after birth. Babies exposed to chronic stress have psychological consequences.

Children who have stressed parents may show range of behaviors such as feeling uncomfortable in exploring their environments and clinging to their parents. They can build up a sense of hesitance in exploring themselves and the society. Or the child may show an opposite behavior where the child actively avoids or ignores his/her caregiver.

Parents are supposed to be role models for their children. These very children coming from over stressing households tend to grow up the same way as their parents. And eventually you realize the cycle never ends. 

 

SOLUTIONS:

Decreasing your stress level requires time and practice. One can’t just wish stress to go away, you have to make it happen. Carve out some time from your routine and engage yourself in any relaxing activity or stress reducing activity. Basically, engage yourself in things that make you feel better and happy!

 

YOGA

One can always choose to do Yoga. yoga is a very effective way to attain mental peace. It works as a stress buster and keeps you healthy both mentally and physically. Yoga not only helps you in being more patient but also helps develop positive attitude towards life.

 

GIVING TIME TO YOUR HOBBIES AND INTERESTS:

Involving yourself in activities you have interest in or giving time to your hobbies and interests is another solution. When you do things you like, it makes you feel happy as well, as it relieves your stress. Spend your time in playing an instrument or dancing as music acts like an anti-stress therapy.

 

PLANNING TRIPS:- A BREAK FROM STRESSING SITUATIONS

Outing on weekends, planning weekends for trips, connecting yourself to the beauty of the world can help you to attain an optimistic perspective.

SPENDING TIME WITH FAMILY AND CLOSE ONES:-

Theories and studies prove that spending time with the people you love is one of the most effective way to overcome stress. They remind you of who you actually are and they somewhat manage to keep you from drowning in stress. 

 

ENGAGING WITH YOUR CHILD:-

Parents are supposed to be role models for their children. Helping them with their academics or teaching them some sports or indulging in some co-curricular activities will make your bond stronger with your child and will keep you away from negativity and frustration. Basically, it will remind you of what you are for your child and what you need to do to make sure that he/she turns out to be better.

 

TALK:-

“Speak out loud”. “Give words to your feelings”. Hold on to these mantras and I bet you will overcome stress. Talking about what is causing you stress is a tried and tested theory. Enroll for professional counselling. If you do not feel comfortable opening up to a stranger, consider talking to someone your own. Keeping feelings locked in, makes you a ticking bomb ready to burst.

A CHILD’S ROLE:-

If the child is old enough to assume responsibility, he/she shall make sure that he does not become the cause of his/her parents’ stress. Also, he/she shall indulge in open communication with his/her parents, try to understand their viewpoints of things, probably try to be their companion through tough times. A successful parent child relationship can never be a one way street.

The Better we nourish the seeds, the healthier the plant grows.

 

Life is tough and it gets tougher when you assume responsibility, hence stress makes an entrance. You cannot run from it, cannot ignore it too. It can only be dealt with. SO FIGHT! Fight for the sake of your children that you love so immensely because this article was nothing but a reminder that you as a parent stressing over things and reacting is only hampering the growth of the child that you created with love.

Also Check: Signs that you are Overstressed!!!